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"'How? What? How?' Three excellent questions."
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November 28 2007

"I, Malcolm" by Nathan Fillion. Want to read something really cool?

I bought this book and after Jane's intro, turned avidly first to Nathan's essay, drawn by its title (and went next to Natalie Hayne's, which I also loved.)

Nathan is almost larger than life, in so many ways - it really tickled me that he included his mom's permission slip at the end. It's very balancing.
Hey, no fair making me get all teary-eyed at work. That was just... super duper.
That was great. I think he reached the zenith of Malness when he used the word "truthsome."
So very very very ... shiny.
I've read and reread the Book, and "I, Malcolm" is hands down my favorite. :)
There was the other actor up for the role, of whom Iím a huge fan.

Does anyone know who this was?
That alone makes me want to buy this book.
He's got a way with words, that Mr. Fillion. Auditioning sounds very stressful. I for one am very glad he got the part. Even more so on hearing how much he wanted it.

Just... tears.

Thank you.
OH my god..... I am so emotional.... verklempt... talk amongst yourselves. I loved the bit about dreaming and fantasizing about flying then getting the wings. Sometimes I begin to wonder why I am so enamoured with Firefly and the cast crew involved, and this essay just reaffirms it.
I was quite surprised at how moved I was by Mr Fillion's lovely little essay, reading the comments, I'm happy to see I'm not the only one.
Yep, nice essay. Buy the book people, it's a cracker.

(not all the essays are as emotive as Nathan's but they're all worth reading)
Ditto that, ChosenOne!

I'm all teary and sniffleying and yea. Warm inside.
Wow. That was a little bit of awesome right there. *sniffle*
Mmmmm does anyone know who that other actor is
Tears here, too. And a warm shiny feeling. That was wonderful. many tears.

awww Cap'n.
I choose to believe Nathan would feel the same way had the show gone on for 10 years. Maybe not realistic(or fully realized...ahem), but that's what I want to believe. Cuz Nathan's just one of the awesomest actors I've ever met. I'll never forget the Kerry Fundraiser when my hubby wanted to get a poster autographed and all we had was a crappy pen, and Nathan went digging for a marker. Then he let another actor use his back as a table to sign for us. And then when he poked Nick Brendan's eye out again for me. See? Awesome.
This made me smile so much. It made me happy to be able to keep scrolling and reading. So well-written and saying all the things one hopes a favorite actor playing a favorite character really feels about the part.

Super-duper shiny!
See we're such a family- I teared up too, came back here and didn't feel alone anymore. :) That was a truly beautiful essay, makes me respect Nathan all the more. It seems like he understands and appreciates how important Firefly is to people. Sometimes the feeling that it creates and the importance it takes on to people transcends words- I know I've been unable to coherently describe its' absolute magic- but he did a wonderful job. Wow. Just makes my love for the verse grow(hard to believe that's even possible). And I'm all weepy again...
Great essay. I'm VERY curious who the other actor was that almost became Mal.
Did Sean ever pay him the money? :-)
Was planning on getting this book for myself while doing my x-mas shopping next week, but may have to take a special trip to Powell's Bookstore now, just so I can have a little Malcolm/Nathan fix wherever I go.
Plus, they don't know it yet, but half of my family is getting this book for x-mas. The other half, Firefly itself.
Can we get Nathan to try his hand at penning some Firefly comics? Or, in a perfect world, an episode of the inevitable season 2?
That was super duper.
I am SO in love.
I don't want to know who the other actor was. It would get me all thinky in ways I don't want to be.
Just amazing. There's something in my eye...
Simon, you might want to change the description. "Really cool" doesn't even begin to cover it. ;)
I'm enjoying a week off work at the moment and have chosen to spend this valuable time re-watching Firely. Again.

I've got something in both my eyes...*sniff*
I love the gold crutch. And the final line, of course. And the smell of the ship.
Oh, wow. I've always raved about Nathan's performance as Mal, and this just explains so much about how he was able to imbue the character with as much life and depth as he did. Excellent read.

Also, the note from his mother is just hilarious.
He is going to make somebody an awesome husband someday (he already makes an awesome son :-).
We already knew about the apple, but now I have the strangest vision of Mal with mittens.

And Jayne with his mom-made hat.
I'm dying to know who that other actor was.

Also, what a fine essay. Nathan's clearly a man of great intellect, humanity and wit.

[ edited by melanie on 2007-11-29 04:09 ]
Aw. That made me boo-hoo. And not just because I'm drunk!
OK, I guess it's not the hormones...everyone else is crying too. Nathan is the best because he's one of us. I love my captain!
That was just so beautiful! I have loved a few shows but Firefly will always be my favorite. I can watch it over and over again and never get bored, never want to skip an episode, a scene, or a sentence. I love every character and enjoyed every moment they were on screen. I actually ached for this show when they canceled it and mourned for my loss. The movie helped and I'm happy for it but I'll always wonder where Joss would have taken us with these beloved characters who do feel like family to me.
Oh, wow. Tears, man - I have tears. Just beautiful.

I have both of those collections, but have yet to get the time to finish either one. Nathan's recount of his overall experience is just further proof of how special the whole 'verse really was/is.
The love Nathan has, and so eloquently writes about, for Mal was/is palpable for me when I watch an episode of Firefly or the movie Serenity.
I love that essay and will definitely be getting that book. In fact, I'm getting one for me, and one for my sis for Xmas.
*wipes tear* Beautiful. Thanks Nathan.
So, what was it like to be Mal? I donít know. ... I guess, imagine wanting, all your life, to be able to fly. Daydreaming about it, fantasizing about it. Imagine that flying was all you ever wanted. Then, for a few months, somebody gave you wings.

Damn. If that doesn't sum it up, then I don't know what. And whoever it was that also went up for the part, I bear him nothing but good will, but I simply cannot imagine anyone else playing the part of Mal. Nathan was, and is, the Captain of Serenity for all time, heart and soul.
So: I come back here to post my tears and the gorramn deck is already awash in them, with a danger they'll leak down through the grating into the works, maybe even crash the ship.

From a DVD extra, Nathan: "I am so not this guy."
Yet he wanted what he recognized in the character when he first read, then got the part and won us over.
I, Mal, indeed.
Thank you, Nathan and Joss.
What I love about Nate is he gets it. Really gets it. That he's a fan, same as me, gawking over and indulging in an experience that we shared. Somehow we two (and the lot of you) strangers are brought together, aligned, and travel some distance together. And we're friends, amnesiatic friends who will kind of forget each other but not the journey we took together, though displaced by time we may have been. He took the trip years before I did but I joined him, the years later, to share the experience.

Why "Firefly"? Why that show? Why come? Asking myself this question is like asking myself why I love mom. I just do. She taught me things. She was there when I hurt. We laugh together. She dared me in all the right ways to improve myself and wonder what was possible. So though I ask myself "Why Firefly?" it's not a question I question much at all.

Now I feel I've gone all squishy on the inside. As an outsider looking in at myself, I question, "Don't you feel kind of, I dunno, embarrassed that you're expressing such at a television show?" And the answer is, honestly, I should. But I don't. I just don't. I won't deny the wonderful experience I had with these characters. We did amazing things together. We. Us. Family. Shared history.

Thank you, Nate, for being a part of my family (and you, too, crew!). Could I possibly be any more fan-y? Maybe I ought to exercise more.
I couldn't finish it. It just brought the ache back too strongly. Sounds lame, or candy-assed, or get-a-grip-on-priorities. I couldn't even finish Firefly Flanatic's post! "I have loved a few shows but Firefly..." did me in. That's as far as I got.

Maybe it's because I'm so tired... but I'm still hooked.
That was beautiful. I have tissues, if anyone needs one.

I'm so glad that this role was so much more than just another pay packet to Nathan and the rest of the cast.

I have been to a convention where the 'guest star' answered in monosyllables and basically said they'd never watched the show and did not understand the interest in it.
And yes, it was a Whedon show.

Thank god Nathan 'gets it' and looks back as fondly, if not MORE fondly, than we do.
I just adore the way this man expresses himself. Can't wait till he writes his memoir...or book of essays...or whatever he cares to put his mind to writing.
That was so very beautifully shiny *sniffle*. It made me ache all over again for the loss.
I'll always miss BtS and AtS but they each had a good run. As much as I loved Serenity, it was just one two hour plus film, and so there will always be an empty place where the rest of Firefly should be.

Damn but Nathan is eloquent! He may be the perfect man.
Dammit, now I'm all weepy at work.

I adore that man.

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