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"Mercy, forgiveness, trust. Those are the things he left back there."
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December 02 2003

"The Quotable Slayer". A brand spanking new book containing more than 900 quips, quotes and snatches of dialogue from the show. Or alternatively save money and go here instead.

So if you had to pick one quote from the show, what would it be?

Hmm..hard question...Off the top of my head:

"Buffy, I'm here to kill you not to judge you."

-Holden Webster, Conversations with Dead People

[ edited by protector on 2003-12-02 15:47 ]

[ edited by protector on 2003-12-02 15:48 ]
yes, very tough... what I love about having the DVD's is that even when I have an urge to watch the overall worst episodes there are still gems like "I'm pregnant by my stepbrother who'd rather be with my best friend whose left me with no place to live. No food except this bottle of wild turkey which I drank all up." uttered by the same character who later says "Oh, Buffy. You really need to have every square inch of your ass kicked."
My choice is always a tie:

"Every now and then..."


"I'd like to test that theory..."

Go Giles.
"I like the quiet"


"I'd like to test that theory"

(I'm leaving out any willow quotes because they are all my favorites)
"Oh — as usual — dear."
"Every night I save you."
"I refuse to become a monster because I look like a monster. I have a soul. I have a conscience. I am a human being. Oh, stop the car!"

-mostly because of what immediately follows this line! hee!
"That'll put marzipan in your pie plate bingo!"


"They got...the mustaarrd ouuut!"

oh and

"and the funny just keeps coming"
There are so many but I have to go with Xander on this one:

"Where's the creep that turned me into a spider eating man bitch?"

Followed by...

"I'm finished being everybody's butt monkey!"

I would like to add this little scene with Oz and Willow because this was the moment I knew I was watching great writing:

Oz: "I'm gonna ask you to go out with me tomorrow night. And I'm kinda nervous about it, actually. It's interesting."
Willow: "Oh. Well, if it helps at all, I'm gonna say yes."
Oz: "Yeah, it helps. It creates a comfort zone. Do you wanna go out with me tomorrow night?"
Willow, cringing and slapping her forehead: "Oh! I can't!"
Oz: "Well, see, I like that you're unpredictable."
The hardest thing to do in this world is to live in it.
Good one Unitas....still gives me goosebumps....
"Yeah, especially with Angel here and all.........oops."
"I'm the one with the level head and yours is the one things roll off of" - the ultimate Willow quote.

And from Buffy to Willow, "Right now I'm just trying not to die" - from The Prom - makes me cry just thinking about it.
oh gosh, there are just too many good ones!! but a few off the top of my head..

"The hardest thing in this world is to live in it"
-Buffy (The Gift)

"Why can't you be dealing drugs like normal people?"
-Principal Snyder (Choices?)

And of course, one from Xander:
"I won't waste the perfect comeback on you, but don't think I don't have it, Oh, yes, its time will come."
-Xander (Bad Girls)
It's overused, but I love it.

"I made a promise to a lady." -Spike (The Gift)
"well im not exactly quaking in my stylish, yet affordable, boots, but there's definately something unnatural going on here and that doesn't usually lead to hugs and puppies.."

that kills me every time:)
"the world is doomed"
And from Buffy to Willow, "Right now I'm just trying not to die" - from The Prom - makes me cry just thinking about it.

Cris | December 02, 19:59 CET

"I can't breathe Will! I feel like I can't breathe."


oh yeah, and my alltime fav:

GILES: Yes, it's terribly simple. The good guys are always stalwart and true, the bad guys are easily distinguished by their pointy horns or black hats, and, uh, we always defeat them and save the day. No one ever dies, and everybody lives happily ever after.

BUFFY: Liar.

[ edited by jeebs on 2003-12-02 20:31 ]
I wouldn't say it's my favourite, but it does make me giggle:

"'Do you like my mask? Isn't it pretty? It raises the *dead*!' Americans!"

My all time favourite, gives me the shivers every time, is:

Anyanka: "How do you know the other world is any better than this?"
Giles: "Because it has to be."

And the one I am just dying to use on someone:

Cordelia: "What IS your childhood trauma?"

"That's insane troll logic!"
Another striking quote.
The doctors words in Buffy's mind:

"We have to lie so you feel better:
Willow on college: "But here, the energy, the collective intelligence... It's like this force, this penetrating force, and I can just feel my mind opening up, you know, and letting this place just thrust into and- and spurt knowledge into... That sentence ended up in a different place than it started out in."
Angelus: "Now that's everything, huh? No weapons, no friends, no hope. Take all that away, and what's left?"
Buffy: "Me."

Makes me shiver every time.
Oh, and Willow again, with the dating: "I had this whole thing worked out. And I had it written down, uh, but then it didn't make any sense when I was reading it back."
Willow: "Didn't we already deja this vu?"

Hmmm hard, I love so much quotes so 2 :

CORDELIA: So, does looking at guns really make girls wanna have sex? That's scary.
XANDER: Yeah, I guess.
CORDELIA: Well, does looking at guns make you wanna have sex?
XANDER: I'm seventeen. Looking at linoleum makes me wanna have sex.


GILES: Yes, it's terribly simple. The good guys are always stalwart and true, the bad guys are easily distinguished by their pointy horns or black hats, and, uh, we always defeat them and save the day. No one ever dies, and everybody lives happily ever after.
BUFFY: Liar.
That's tough. Here's a few of my favs ...

Dawn's in trouble. Must be Tuesday.

Bored now.

Who’s a little fear demon? Come on! Who’s a little fear demon!

a doodle. i do doodle. u do too, you do doodle too!

if we want her to be exactly she'll never be exaclty the only really real buffy is buffy and she's dead who?
prolific & witless - The quotes from 'The Wish' & 'Becoming' are 2 and 3 on my list. There something about them (and the quote from 'The Gift' above) that just sum up the whole nature of the series to me.
Ooh, so many. My tops:

"I say to them...well, I don't say anything to them, because I kill them."
-The Master

"I have to believe in a better world."
"Go ahead. I have to live in this one."
-Giles and Buffy

"Oh. Yes, I am a lesbian."

G: "We can't let you go until we're sure that you're impotent or-"
S: "Hey!"
G: "Sorry, poor choice of words. Until we know that you're..."
B: "Flaccid?"
S: "You are one step away, missy!"
B: "Giles, help! He's gonna scold me."
-Giles, Spike and Buffy

"Breathtaking. It's like somebody slaughtered an Abercrombie and Fitch catalogue."
You guys have forgoten the saddest one of all.

"I'm sixteen Giles....I don't wanna die." - Buffy
Oh! That whole "tell me my fortune" speech was fantastic.
Took me all day, but I finally came up with, "It's as if you know me." (Giles in response to Buffy's "'Blah, blah, biddy blah, I'm so stuffy give me a scone.'")

The linoleum one's another favorite.
Two of my favorites:

WILLOW: "I'm a bloodsucking fiend! Look at my outfit!"

WILLOW: "That's me as a vampire?! I'm so evil and skanky... and I think I'm kinda gay."
Willow's first attempt to seduce Oz:

WILLOW: Do you wanna make out with me?

OZ: What?

WILLOW: Forget it. I'm sorry. Well, do you?

OZ: Sometimes when I'm sitting in class--you know, I'm not thinking about class, 'cause that would never happen--I think about kissing you. And it's like everything stops. It's like, it's like freeze frame. Willow kissage. (pause) Oh, I'm not gonna kiss you.

WILLOW: What? But freeze frame!

OZ: Well, to the casual observer, it would appear that you're trying to make your friend Xander jealous or even the score or something. And that's on the empty side. See, in my fantasy when I'm kissing *you*, you're kissing *me*. It's okay. I can wait.

[As much as I adored Tara, Oz really was the coolest.]
"As Willow goes, so goes my nation."
Man, i really love this post!:) i could read all these quotes all day... it makes me smile. It helps remind me of things if forgotten.
You’re not friends, you’ll never be friends; you’ll be in love till it kills you both. You’ll fight and you’ll shag and you’ll hate each other till it makes you quiver, but you’ll never be friends. Love isn’t brains children, it’s blood. Blood screaming inside you to work its will. I may be love’s bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it. -Spike ...Great quote.
yes! vamRIPire!! that is the one! im a 21 year old guy and that just makes me melt!!!!

i also have yet another one:

"I'll just let it burn"-buffy
I'm not sure if anyone's chosen this one already, but-

"I don't like vampires. I'm gonna take a stand and say they're not good." - Xander from 'The Harvest'
For a new quotable series, I'd recommend The O.C. The writers are getting more and more quirky with the language they choose to use. I'd give you an example from today's episode, but I'm too sleepy this morning to remember.
Three memorable quotes for me.

Angel- "You're still my girl?"
Buffy - "Always"

Gets me everytime.

And a classic Spike quote

"You're not friends. You'll never be friends. You'll be in love 'till it kills you both. You'll fight, and you'll hate each other 'till it makes you quiver, but you'll never be friends. Love isn't brains children, it's blood. Blood screaming inside you to work it's will. I may be love's bitch, but at least I'm man enough to admit it".

And finally the Mayor, the big bad who always got the best lines.

Well, I wish you kids the best, I really do. But if you don't mind a bit of fatherly advice, I, uh, I-I just don't see much of a future for you two. I don't sense a lasting relationship. And not just because I plan to kill you. You two have a bumpy road ahead.
Also The Mayor:

"That's one spunky little girl you've raised. I'm going to eat her."

I wish there'd been more Giles/Mayor interaction/confrontation.
Everything here is hard, and bright, and violent. Everything I feel, everything I touch. this is Hell. Just getting through the next moment, and the one after that, knowing what I've lost... They can never know. Never.

- Buffy (Afterlife)
Though I have several quotes in my profile, I don't think I could ever be able to pinpoint one single quote and say that it's my favorite. There are just far to many. I guess I could say that one of my top all time favorites would have to be Anya's speech in The Body.

Lately, the one we've been actually saying the most around the house, has been "Sometimes I shouldn't say words", a line from Xander in Chosen.

I have to agree with Shroomlet on D'Hoffryn's Abercrombie and Fitch line, too. I died laughing when he said that.

I'm never good at remembering the specific lines, so I've found this site to be rather helpful - Buffyverse Dialogue Database.
This could go on forever...Greyflowers, that's funny, because "Sometimes I shouldn't say words" is a commonly uttered sentence in our house, too!

I've ordered 4 copies of the book's my last contribution:

"Cuppa tea, cuppa tea, almost got shagged, cuppa tea?"
Reading all of these quotes make me miss Buffy even more!! Here are a couple of quotes from Intervention -

Giles: "I, uh, jump out of the circle, and I jump back in it, and then um (reluctantly)... I shake my gourd."
Buffy: "Oh, I know this ritual! The ancient Shamans were next called upon to do the hokey pokey and turn themselves around."

Buffy: "The who whating how with huh?"
That line makes me laugh every time!!
Which of course brings us to "Spike's what in the whatment?"
lala, yes, hysterical! Both of them! And, I loved when Giles performed the ritual, Buffy said, "And that's what it's all about."

Okay, one more:

"I'm drowning in footwear!"
OK here's an Angel quote that I love everytime I hear it:

Wesley to Justine: "I'll take away your bucket."
Protector, that is a great one...another:

I had my throat slit and all my friends abandoned me.
All time favorite Angel quote:

Wesley: I’m a rogue demon hunter now.
Cordelia: Wow. - What’s a rogue demon?
I like this one from Cordy:

"So I started researching and anyway, I'm right. There is a potion, a protective potion. I take it and bang! I can."

And the more serious one from Angel:

"Let them fight the good fight. Someone has to fight the war."
One more before this thread drops off the screen:
"Madness, and... Madness and stabbing pain, and, and, uh... oh... oh... memory! of, uh, ill deeds I have done."

(Xander in Oedipus at the end of The Puppet Show)
I got that book, it was ok, not enough quote-y goodness though, I like so many quotes.(much as a B/A shipper I am I like these ones...)

XANDER: Hmm, it's sad, granted. But let's look at the upside for a moment. I mean, what kind of a future would she've really had with him? She's got 2 jobs -- Denny's waitress by day, Slayer by night -- and Angel's always in front of the TV with a big blood belly, and he's dreamin' of the glory days when Buffy still thought this whole creature of the night routine was a big turnon.

WILLOW: You've thought way too much about this.

XANDER: No, no. That's just the beginning. Have I told you the part where I fly into town in my private jet and take Buffy out for prime rib?

WILLOW: Xander...

XANDER: And she cries?


BUFFYBOT: Angel's lame. His hair sticks straight up and he's bloody stupid.

Ahh.. I do love the Buffybot!! Also...

XANDER: No one is judging you. It's understandable. Spike is strong & mysterious & sorta compact but well muscled.

BUFFY: I am *not* having sex with Spike! But I'm starting to think that *you* might be!

teehee! I love Buffy!

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