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"You get the Watcher. You get the mom. You get the little Scooby gang. What do I get? Jack squat."
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November 04 2005

Joss posts about the Serenity DVD artwork. It's short and to the point (reg req).

Well. That explains a lot.
Heh, very nice :)
I think I've seen the next t-shirt slogan for Browncoats.
Ha. Well, I think from that we can guess just how he feels about it.
I didn't think you were the boss of it Joss.
I'd have been more afraid if he had been the boss of it.
Yeah, a little part of me would've died had I thought he had input into that cover. I could pretty much tell that thing didn't come from his brain.

edit for bad spelling

[ edited by dizzy on 2005-11-03 22:20 ]
I'm fairly certain he doesn't actually believe anyone believed he had anything to do with it. The post is a reference to his earlier one about the cancellation of Serenity in Israel, which made him unhappy, and about which he used essentially the same line

He's commiserating with us, not responding to people who might think he was responsible.

[ edited by theonetruebix on 2005-11-03 22:23 ]
Having tried to register for that site multiple times with no luck over the last 10 months or so...anyone be kind enough to share Joss' always enlightening comments?
I didn't think he thought I thought he was the boss of it - just commiserating right back at 'em. *wink*
Joss Whedon has to walk a fine line. He can't say "OH MY GOD. GOD OH MY. OH. GOD. MY." online. Because I'm sure we can all work out why (How to piss off the people who pay your wage... Tick).

£10 bet he logged onto Whedonesque, saw the artwork, and turned into Chandler inside. Or at least, had a mini Chandler moment.

Or a Janice moment, anyway.
MrArg, here's what he said.

Guess what else I'm not the boss of.


As theonetruebix pointed out, it's a reference to what he said about the Israeli cancellation a couple of days back.

I just wanted to say that I've gotten packets of letters and artwork and collages and just huge, lovely feedback from the Israeli fans and so this news gives me a sadness. If any of you guys are reading this, I just wanna say, uh... find a friend with a big TV. And sorry. I'm not the boss of this. -joss.

thanks

[ edited by xander fan on 2005-11-03 22:45 ]
MrArg, "Guess what else I'm not the boss of." - Joss
Simon/eddy, my thanks. And Joss, the film still kicks a ridiculous amount of ass no matter what them boys in marketing puke up after their meth binges.
MrArg said
the film still kicks a ridiculous amount of ass no matter what them boys in marketing puke up after their meth binges.


...which should be the tagline on the DVD.
right on, dizzy.

at the very worst, guys, we can make our own extra shiny dvd covers.
I hereby give my permission to use it on the Special Edition :D
Agreed, dizzy.
I think the llama should be the thumbnail shot the top bit of the side spine on the Special Edition...
Here is my vote for a Special Edition.

[ edited by DarenG on 2005-11-03 23:16 ]
I can't wait for the Special Llamaized Edition of Serenity! I'll start saving up immediately.

(Yes, yes, I know it's not a real word)
Well, it's at least a good sign that El Whedon is oh-so-subtly signaling his discontent (and perhaps less subtly so behind the scenes). Do they really want to anger him/us THAT much? These things have repercussions.

But I kind a feel sorry for the guys. Their job is not easy and I've read that pets are good for relieving stress. Maybe we should all chip in and send the Universal Marketing department it's very own pet llama.

[ edited by bobster on 2005-11-03 23:28 ]
Why MrArg, I do believe you might make us famous.

It'd be a mighty fine blurb, that's for sure. By the llamas and sexed up super River. Right underneath, of course, Joss's quote.
Heh, okay, I'd actually buy this cover if it made fun of itself in that way.

But yes, a "Guess what else I'm not the boss of." t-shirt would be great :-)
Thank you Simon, I'm not registered there either.
In fairness, I do think the Universal New Media marketing people really tried with Serenity. I'm not saying they got it right, but they did try. A lot. Universal Home Entertainment, I presume, have their own artwork department. I don't know how long this cover took to design, but I'd estimate about an afternoon in Photoshop. Maybe a day. Half the day spent adding a zombie army thing. And the llama.

Serenity was never going to be an easy sell, but in the case of this movie my personal belief was less-is-more. Tease people. Don't overload them. In retrospect, the same problem was visible in the trailers. If you throw everything on the canvas, you're going to confuse people or just plain put them off.

And where the hell was the llama on the trailers?
Yep, the llama could have saved this movie. Just a bare-bones trailer, a llama walking onto the movie screen saying "Go see Serenity Now!". People'd laugh at the Seinfeld reference, laugh when the llama went of - but not after spitting at the screen - and would think: wow, I have to go see this! It's about a weird talking llama called Serenity! Maybe they'll throw in penguins too! That should be fun!

Then again....maybe not :-p
I agree it isn't the greatest cover and I think Joss should maybe have been allowed more involvement in it, but Universal have done a lot for the film, and it probably wouldn't exist without them. Granted, most of us don't think they did a great job of marketing it, especially with this cover, but these people are only doing their jobs and they are putting on the cover what they think will sell the most units.

Perhaps it is a horrendous cover and it won't maximise the units of the DVD sold, but how does anyone know that any of alternative covers they suggest will sell more?

Basically I agree, it isn't great, but can we move on? The film itself is still amazing and personally I don't care what it comes packaged in.
In those eight little words, I gather Joss is about a 10 on the miffed off scale.
So when does the big internet "Make A Better Serenity DVD Cover" contest begin???
That Joss...he's got a way with words! He'll rule on VM next week
wissxwe wrote: So when does the big internet "Make A Better Serenity DVD Cover" contest begin???

Check out the thread on the Universal board. There is some nice stuff over there! :)
these people are only doing their jobs and they are putting on the cover what they think will sell the most units.

That's just an assumption. It is very possible the designers saw this as 'another sf flic job' and just patched some stuff together. Frankly that's certainly what it looks like to me. I certainly see no love of the movie in this. I see a cheap attempt to change what it really is, (lasers! plains of charging armies!)

Perhaps it is a horrendous cover and it won't maximise the units of the DVD sold, but how does anyone know that any of alternative covers they suggest will sell more?

Under that (rather dubious) premise, no company of any book, CD, DVD, Comic, etc. should ever care about packaging. That's not how it works. Packaging is extremely important and it definitely matters in sales. And given what this exudes, it will come across on a lot of people in a certain, bad, cheap B-movie way.

Basically I agree, it isn't great, but can we move on? The film itself is still amazing and personally I don't care what it comes packaged in.

Well solely speaking for myself, I care because I have a big ole movie and TV collection, and I like those things to look nice when I buy them rather than have them look like crap. Secondly I care because packaging matters in sales, and I care whether or not this sells well, and I think this will hurt sales.

Deliberatedly giving false impressions of a movie means you have no faith in it. You're trying to trick people into buying it by pretending it's something else and hope they don't find out until they buy it. It's dishonest, it's ugly and it's dumb. People buying it might go "So where's that scene with the charging army?? What a rip!" or something. Conscioulsy created false expectations are a bad idea from a marketing perspective.

As for your 'can we move on' remark....I never understand that. If a thread doesn't interests me, I simply don't go there and don't read it or post. I don't go there to tell other people to stop posting. A bit strange...

Anyhoo....."guess what else I'm not the boss of.." Cracks me up. I needed a laugh. I love that guy. And that love is at least 76% platonic....
Isn't the llama the spokescreature for the
I'm thinking I need a Tshirt that says "Joss is the boss of me".
You know what I'm concerned about next.. The back of the DVD. It'll have a description and everything. If it mentions llamas..
EdDantes rocks---great post!
Gossi, stop posting! You could give very bad ideas to people responsible for this DVD!

And, indeed, Joss' words... hilarious, as always.
I think the back of the DVD should have the quote "Guess what else I'm not the boss of".
New cover from "Mudron". I'm almost tempted to post that as a new thread of fan art covers, hee.

[ edited by gossi on 2005-11-04 00:58 ]
gossi, is that a real Joss quote?
gossi, that is so. damn. SWEET. If only....
Probably not. I think it's fairly clear it's a joke, though.

Reissued DVD cover.
There's a sink over the llama.
That won't do at all!

Without the Llama, what is serenity?
Nothing!
...But the best movie ever.
There is no llama.
If the artwork does get changed, they had better keep the llama ;)

Recently whenever I think of Serenity, I automatically think of the llama!

I wonder what the cast think of the DVD artwork?
There is no spoon, either. Only the kitchen sink.
I bet ya they all think it's horrid.
But they all probably love the llama.

The Llama is now a part of Serenity.

Edited to add:
Serenity Acres Llama Ranch

I'm beginning to think the llama was put there on purpose.

[ edited by JustNick on 2005-11-04 01:48 ]
Good find, JustNick!
It's a sereni-llama-spiracy!
Someone needs to get Joss to comment on the llamas.
JustNick - I'm sure it'll end up being referenced at some point.

If not, after the singing and dancing requests at the Serenity 2 premiere, I will ask Joss to talk about the llama...

(Joss, if you don't know, we think there's a llama on the Serenity DVD cover. We have enlarged pictures of it and everything. You need to work it into the next Serenity comic)

By the way, does anybody remember Llamatron on the Amiga?

[ edited by gossi on 2005-11-04 02:05 ]
Is it me or is this one of the funniest threads ever?
Llamas. ALWAYS funny.
Joss...I feel for you, man...really I do...

I wish you did have the power to change the cover...

Just make sure they keep the llama. It's geniusly inept.
Who was it who said Joss is the nerd Llama?

edited for spelling..NOT
I find it incredibly sad that the cover for the Serenity Graphic Novel/Trade Paperback is a thousand times better than the cover for the DVD.

Joss got all these amazing artists to do covers for the comic books; you'd think someone at Universal would've thought, "Hey, maybe we should get one of those comic book artists to do the DVD cover!"
Ha! This was nice to wake up to this morning. Lot's of funny.
'Cept Joss post made me a little sad. Now all the fan art covers are just brilliant and cracking me up.
So....anyone know where one may find some hi res pix of Serenity anywhere? A couple of us Ozzies want in on the action.

It must be hard for the BDH's after all the work that has been put into the film, to have it pulled from so many countrys and now this. I kinda see that look on Mals face as they're all left in Serenity Valley, and apply it to this hey. Which isn't really laughter inducing. So here I am.
Back onto the silly...
nixygirl - I wouldn't be too sad. As a fan, we can just print our own covers to replace the Universal one. Movie still the same. I'm thankful Joss got to make the movie he wanted to make at the time.
I can't even express how RELIEVED I was to see Joss' post. I was seriously concerned. At least we are all in this together. And so is the llama! Another Serenity Llama Farm.
More on the nefarious "Serenity" llama connection.


(Sorry...can't get the link to work for some reason right now! Me bad technopeasant.)

[ETA: All better now - need to add "_href" after a. Your friendly neighborhood moderator]

Oh. Was trying to be lazy and not do the clicky magic word thing but just have people click on the address, but I guess that doesn't work.

[ edited by bobster on 2005-11-04 19:59 ]
In a week or whenever when the new google stats come out, and "Serenity Llama" is in the top five.

I'll be so happy.
You know, someone should really write the story that the cover shows. Something with lasers, llamas, and a big old crowd of zombies.

Could be interesting.
What's up with Serenity and the Llamas? Do I smell a nefarious conpiracy here?
"Lasers and Llamas and Zombies..Oh My!"
And naked Kaylee and the rest of the naked crew will be in the story.

Maybe one of the cast will write it, and film it as a short.
One of the hobbits did something of the sort on lord of the rings.
Bobster - Bahahahahaha, that is classic! Brilliant, seriously!

and Gossi - I suppose my hopes of sequel are just getting a little more squished, each week. For the most part I am totally happy that we have what we have. I think part of my problem was that yesterday I had done a little search and re-read all of the posts Joss wrote in the lead up, and his hopes for sequels, and promises of more stories. I'm kinda like M'Cookies, I imagined senarios of Mchappy meal Reavers, well hoped for it anyways. So, after reading all those excited happy posts from Joss, to reading this little one line of kinda sad. It was just a little disheartening to hear. Not that I am expecting long posts from the guy, or maybe I'm reading into it more than what is there. Anyways, I am gonna stop now, cause everything I seem to be saying is sounding kinda wrong.

So, for the cover, EpicJoe's is amazing.
Also, hi res pix, anyone?

[ edited by nixygirl on 2005-11-04 04:55 ]
I recognized a name on the petition here

;)

look for post 1511

[ edited by Harpy on 2005-11-04 05:11 ]
Harpy, I can't read the sigs. Who is it?
It says
1511
Nathan Fillion
It is apparent that whomever did the art did not see the movie. Have more faith in the film.
Wonder if it really is him?
I don't think so. Aren't his parents english teachers? A teacher's son would never make a grammatical error, right?

On the other hand it is a double post, which speaks for someone versed in computers, but not terribly comfortable.

Edited for grammatical errors and unsuspecting llamas.

[ edited by Harpy on 2005-11-04 05:33 ]
Wow, that is kool!
Also those llamas sure have a lot to answer for! I am surely convinced there is a conspiracy happening.
Blue Hand Llamas?
Not entirely impossible you know! (if you over look the fact that llamas don't have hands)
Maybe just for the llamas they made a subdivision of the Blue Cloves?

"four by four"

[ edited by Harpy on 2005-11-04 05:47 ]
Well, "clams got legs!" ... so I don't see why llamas can't have hands.
But they do have cloves. and tongues.
Hmm. "Fillion" has the same double-letter pattern as "llama".
I knew it. I knew it. The llama on the cover is Fillion in disguise!
rotflol, this thread is cracking me up.

By now, the mere picture of a llama is enough to sent me into a (manly!) fit of giggles. ;-)
Llamas--I can only hear Cleese or Palin voices when I type that--or no, what bothers me most is not even that it's a terrible cover that has very very little to do with the movie. Though it is terrible and inapt. What bothers me the most is that it's a cover that screams (or spits or whatever llamas do) "I am a direct to video movie!" Our BDM is not DTV!!! [goes to bed in disgust]
!!You can't stop the llama!!

*apologies to petition signer nr. 1518*
Hee hee. You most certainly can't!
Hmm. "Fillion" has the same double-letter pattern as "llama".

theonetruebix | November 04, 06:12 CET

Good point. Many things to ponder. Is there a special message that Fillama is trying to get out to us?
Could it be that the DVD cover art is really a Cover Up?

'There is no Llama', indeed.
Maybe we are just the dreams of many Llamas? Is that why the one on the cover looks so peaceful. It really knows, it stands not in the valley of the Llama, or in the shadow of the Reaver; but amongst it's own thoughts.

As Fillama has written:
It is apparent that whomever did the art did not see the movie. Have more faith in the film.

Do you see, and do you have faith?
OK...meds are kicking in. ;)

ETA: JustNick look what you started? The llamatrix, I do believe you saw it first.

[ edited by nixygirl on 2005-11-04 10:33 ]
Llamas--I can only hear Cleese or Palin voices when I type that-

And now for something completely different (also because we're on the subject, and I'm sitting here laughing in the dark and I just can't help myself):

The Monty Python Llama Sketch

"Look out, there are llamas!"
Llamas are larger than frogs.

Hmmm interesting?

Hee!
Also, a llama walked through a scene and snorted at Agent Cooper in an episode of Twin Peaks.
By the way, does anybody remember Llamatron on the Amiga?


Yep! Marvellous game.

(And terrible DVD artwork, but we all knew that... Sorry Joss, for what they've done to it.)
I don't have access to check the petition email addresses from work. If it's not Nathan's email address, I will void the signatures.

Somebody interesting did sign it under an alternative name, though.

I seriously think somebody should write a fanfic telling Serenity: The DVD cover story as suggested above. In fact, there's a fan movie right there. I'll edit the trailer, just so I can stick "You can't stop the llama" on it.

ETA: My favourite petition quote today: "I took 10 people to see it so count on 10 DVD orders."

[ edited by gossi on 2005-11-04 12:26 ]
Another cover

And another

There's a great many fans saying they see a duck on the cover as well. Can anybody find it? I can't.

This is like a magic eye. I can't help but stare!

[ edited by gossi on 2005-11-04 13:34 ]
okay, those covers crack me up *giggles*

"You can't stop the llama" - that's a new sigquote right there!

Also: a duck? Nope, not seeing it. But if someone does, I'm interested.

'Duck and llama', sounds like a sunday morning cartoon. Maybe they can convert the old US "duck and cover" song for its openingtitles...
Here's a llama, there's a llama,
And a million Reaver llamas,
Summer llama, bummer llama,
Llama llama duck.

(Google "llama song," if you've never seen it...)
Here's a llama, there's a llama,
And a million Reaver llamas,
Summer llama, bummer llama,
Llama llama duck.

Okay, that is now officially the weirdest thing I've read today.
The Llamas are everywhere!

I can see it now, in Serenity Two while walking along a road in a town where they're gonna steal something: A man with a llama, selling covers of some sort.
Oh man if we do ever get a sequel; I surely hope there is a Llama in it!
Llamas are secretive. There are many things in their culture to which we have not been exposed. Until now.

The opera is actually known as "Lucia di Llamamoor" and that's the way it's known in the llamascript. When they get together in the foothills of the Andes to perform it, well, it would have to be rated H18 (for hilarious 18 and over).

Islamabad used to be Islamagood until someone released a pet llama nearby and it flourished.
Drifter-
You got a nice story goin' on there, you should think about expanding on it.

And nooooow:
The cover for
Serenity Two: The Llamaperative

[ edited by JustNick on 2005-11-04 19:57 ]
I am Llamaenting the sadness of the DVD cover
Hilarious covers.

I was surprised to note just now that the Llama blog I found is actually a right-leaning site. Now I've got to me a lefty lama blog, just to even out the cosmic scales.

And, yeah, if there's ever a sequel and there ain't no llamas, I'm going to be sore dissapointed.
And, yeah, if there's ever a sequel and there ain't no llamas, I'm going to be sore dissapointed.

When your llama gets here, just pound this button once.
I do believe I created a monster with this whole llama business.
But it's so much fun, it's a good monster.

Like Clem.

Serenity Three: on a distant planet or moon on the outskirts: The Clem and Llama hour.
What a hilarious thread indeed, JustNick! To use a phrase someone used above, maybe this thread should be made a sticky at the top of the W page, illamaized for all to see.

[ edited by Drifter on 2005-11-05 03:13 ]
That's just an assumption. It is very possible the designers saw this as 'another sf flic job' and just patched some stuff together. Frankly that's certainly what it looks like to me. I certainly see no love of the movie in this. I see a cheap attempt to change what it really is, (lasers! plains of charging armies!)


That's an assumption too. Yes, maybe it was knocked up cheaply, but it's equally as likely that they used whatever marketing techniques they know to present the film how they want to. Perhaps they are going for a mass audience so made it look as over the top as possible, throwing in the ships and strange Reaver army for that reason. Don't get me wrong, I don't feel it's a very accurate representation of the movie, but all I'm saying is Universal may have reasons for using it.

Under that (rather dubious) premise, no company of any book, CD, DVD, Comic, etc. should ever care about packaging. That's not how it works. Packaging is extremely important and it definitely matters in sales. And given what this exudes, it will come across on a lot of people in a certain, bad, cheap B-movie way.


I agree packaging is very important, I'm just saying no-one knows for certain that something else would be better. Just because we as Browncoats might like it more, doesn't mean it will increase its sales. All I'm saying is that these people are employed to sell the DVD, and presumably have qualifications and experience in doing so. Yes, I would really like to see them use one of the fan ones posted here (which I am having difficulty finding now), but I'm just saying, it's not the end of the world.

We still have a great film and I don't think the way its packaged should affect that.

As for your 'can we move on' remark....I never understand that. If a thread doesn't interests me, I simply don't go there and don't read it or post. I don't go there to tell other people to stop posting. A bit strange...


Okay, maybe it didn't make perfect sense, I just don't think everyone should worry themselves about it, and again I think the movie itself is the most important thing.

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